Love Is Blind UK’s Demi and Ollie deserve to be celebrated

Love is blind has finally landed on UK shores and is currently available on Netflix.

With a concept so ridiculous it’s genius, the show captivates audiences with its latest ride of chaotic choices, complicated love triangles and breathtaking romances.

But this time there is also something more to report.

No, this isn’t a chance to see the full range of the UK’s many distinctive accents; it’s a small sample of something we all need. Love is blind in the UKThe most popular couple shows how to deal with chronic illness in a relationship, and it’s the representation we desperately need.

Demi suffers from endometriosis, a condition that causes tissue similar to the lining of the womb to grow outside the womb, which affects around one in ten women in the UK. Her fiancé Ollie has ADHD, as do 2.6 million other people in the UK.

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The two Londoners formed a friendship early on in the pods, forming a connection through their “deep conversations” and shared humour. Demi reinforced Ollie’s belief in their romance by surprising him with a balloon-filled pod and a handmade card for his birthday in episode two, before proposing without ever seeing his face in episode four.

Any attentive observer of Love is blind knows that vulnerability is a crucial ingredient for intimacy to form through that opaque glass wall – and Demi made the first move for this loving couple.

In episode 3, the usually effervescent Demi arrived on a date with Ollie, fighting back tears. Despite feeling safe with Ollie and knowing he wouldn’t judge her, it took her a moment to verbalise her pain. When she did, 1.5 million other people in the UK and millions more around the world felt her pain too.

Demi opened up about how endometriosis could stop her from conceiving naturally, how she struggled “physically and mentally” every month and how it “really ruined her relationships.”

Terrified that her illness meant she was “not enough,” Demi poured out her heart to Ollie, who held it carefully, tenderly. He said Demi “is more than enough” and that endometriosis didn’t change how he felt about her, providing exactly the reassurance Demi needed at that moment.

While the details of Demi’s medical history have not been released, endometriosis can cause a cascade of symptoms. Some include painful periods, fertility difficulties, pelvic pain, mood swings and painful intercourse. The condition begins with the first period and lasts until menopause. There is no cure and treatments are extremely limited.

Dating someone with endometriosis comes with additional challenges, especially because the cause of the condition continues to baffle medical experts and is largely understudied. The associated hormonal symptoms can have devastating effects on a person’s mental health, not to mention the physical symptoms.

Related: Love Is Blind UK’s Tom reveals why his mum missed his wedding

It was beautiful to see Demi face the challenges openly and honestly, with an unwavering confidence in Ollie’s love and their bond. She stood up to the overwhelming stigma and shame surrounding gynecological conditions and told Ollie her whole truth.

The added stigma attached to such health issues demonstrates Demi’s incredible power, reminding us all that vulnerability is a strength, never a weakness. Its importance is also paramount in a romantic relationship, where we need to feel safe enough to let the other person see all of all of us—yes, even those dark, messy parts we try to hide in our mental vaults.

Demi is half of a desperately needed representation. The 16 million people with disabilities and 15 million people with chronic illness rarely get the chance to see their love stories play out on screen. TO DO have romantic relationships, no matter how hard we try to desexualize anyone who is not the picture of health.

Although the couple faced some drama during the group’s honeymoon in Greece, with Ollie almost quitting the show, the duo moved into the apartments in episode six, still eager to be together.

And then came the second part of this beautiful depiction of real life. During a warm chat on the couch, Ollie opened up about his ADHD diagnosis. Demi said she noticed his pacing and impulsiveness – another sign of the devoted attention they had for each other.

Ollie initially struggled to verbalize his experience, admitting he didn’t tell his ex about it until a year into their relationship, but his comfort with Demi eventually won out. He explains that he struggles every day to manage the impact of ADHD.

As Ollie says, ADHD affects people in different ways. The signs are generally divided into inattention and hyperactivity. Symptoms of inattention include being easily distracted, appearing unresponsive, and forgetfulness. Signs of hyperactivity can include an inability to sit still, difficulty concentrating, excessive moving or talking, interrupting conversations, and impulsivity.

Mirroring Ollie’s earlier reaction to his diagnosis, Demi was perfectly able to give him space. She listened intently and reminded him that even though he did things differently, it didn’t make them any less valuable. Their complete ease as a couple shines through in these vulnerable conversations.

Ollie’s diagnosis gives us, and Demi, a little insight into how his mind works, and their shared vulnerability has helped them lay the foundation of mutual understanding on which to build a strong relationship.

Their kindness, patience, and supportive responses to one another should be celebrated as a significant moment in television, especially in the dating world. We all deserve a little of that shared respect in our relationships, because too many of us deprive ourselves of pieces of ourselves in order to more easily fit into another person’s life.

This temptation is never greater than when someone is faced with a stigmatizing diagnosis, such as endometriosis or ADHD. Sometimes, people choose silence to appear more acceptable and avoid judgment; at other times, it’s easier to go into mask mode to cope with the overwhelming impact of an illness.

Whatever the reasons, too many people hide parts of their personality to fit into relationship norms. Love is blind Couple proves no diagnosis makes someone less lovable.

The bond of trust between Demi and Ollie shows everyone that we can expose our most complex struggles to the world and come out on top. No matter what problem a person is facing, a little vulnerability can pave the way for true love and companionship.

We have yet to find out whether the duo will make the ultimate choice and tie the knot in the final episodes (coming to Netflix on August 21), but the impact of their choice to share will linger either way.

Demi and Ollie’s example should resonate three simple things for anyone watching: we are all lovable, we all deserve respect, and we all deserve support.

Love is blind in the UK broadcast on Netflix.

For information and support about ADHD, please visit ADHD in the UKor visit the website of the NHS resource centreIn the United States you can visit the CDC website for more information.